Melissa Hevenor
Sunday April 23 , 2017
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Posts Tagged ‘music’

A Dream Come True: The Journey To Meeting Jessie J

Thursday, April 14th, 2016

It’s been such a long time since I felt inspired to blog because my life has consisted predominately of feeling sick, going to the hospital getting treatment and coming back feeling worse during the battle for my life. Even so, overall I’m still a happy person,  I pray a lot, listen to music and use makeup to keep myself sane and inspired. I love all types of music and music has been a part of my life since I was very little in huge way. At age 5 I started taking voice lessons at the YMCA realizing very early when I was singing it didn’t matter that I was in a wheelchair. people saw my heart they didn’t assume that I wasn’t intelligent they didn’t care that couldn’t run across the playground they saw who I really was inside and not differences. Music helped me get through a world wind childhood filled with a sick mother who was a prisoner of multiple addictions. It wasn’t long before I started entering voice competitions to earn money for food and for what I called my  just in case money stash to give me a sense of security to care for me and my sister. Those circumstances put a lot of pressure on me to succeed, instead, of concentrating on that pressure, I made it a game against myself to always keep improving.

Late at night when I couldn’t sleep because I was hungry or because my mom had not returned home I would hold my hand brush in my hand and pretend to be Singing on stage with Whitney Houston as I belted it out “Saving All My Love For You” at eight years old. Whitney Houston was what I strived to be as a Singer. Fast forward to age 17 doing a voice competition in a small theater Washington D.C.I was offered a record deal. With a broken heart I turned it down because I couldn’t imagine leaving my sister and because I was a minor and my mother was too jealous to grant me the permission. My mother also could sing before drugs and alcohol destroyed her voice she could sing along with Barbra Streisand and you absolutely could not tell the difference between her voice and the record. I went into a deep depression for about a year because I wasn’t able to take that opportunity after working so hard. However, I never stopped getting good grades in school because I knew good grades and education was my only chance to do better for myself and my sister. Thank God, I had two Aunts my grandmother’s sisters who wanted me to have the world and showed me what unconditional love was. My aunt encouraged me to join the drama club when I started high school as well as choir because she saw how fearless I was on stage and how much I loved it. She used to say it may not be easy for you to get opportunity to be in front of crowds because of your differences but the world needs to see you on the stage to make a difference on a large-scale. Getting the chance to audition for Tish School of the arts in New York City was amazing and my Aunt  put money aside to save up for the train tickets and the hotel as the audition process was a  two day thing. I did my audition in front of a panel of five faculty I put my whole  heart into it, a full portfolio of how I would Direct a play by Tennessee Williams.
I was devastated when I didn’t get in until at the very last moment a professor came running out who had been on the panel and said, ” please don’t be discouraged your audition was flawless, logistically the school would be very difficult for you to manage with your wheelchair, the buildings are old elevators don’t work and the amounts of snow that we get in the winter. Of course, the rest of the panel will deny this as the reason but I could not put my head down tonight having you think it was because your audition was not good enough. There’s many amazing art schools out there just put your whole heart in that’s what matters. This was the first time I began to understand that my talent may not be enough so I started studying psychology and that’s the direction my life took. I don’t regret it at all because it prepared me for where I am now to use my intuitive/ Mediumship  skills to help people in a therapeutic way. Music was  on the front burner again as I started taking art therapy classes and realizing how much music and writing helped people with healing. Getting accepted into the University of Maryland I wanted to take dance classes as my electives. Of course, the faculty was not happy thinking I would not be able to show my skills so  how would I be graded. This time I wouldn’t take no for an answer because it was just elective classes so I learned dance notation and I could verbally tell the dancers the different routines. At the end the faculty thanked to me saying that the dancers became better dancers having to learn to truly listen to verbal instruction of the choreography.

Working as a student therapist as student Director of the suicide crisis hot line and going to school full-time in my masters program was extremely demanding so to relax at home I would watch YouTube videos of young singers when I came across Jessie J singing Big White Room. I was one of the first 100 views on that video which now has so many but I knew in that moment she would be a massive star. She had edginess of Janis Joplin the elegance of Whitney Houston and and infectious loving quality similar to the energy of Princess Diana even in the very beginning. Eventually I had to have my thyroid removed because it just stopped working once I had that surgery I was unable to sing the same way again we now know the collapse of my thyroid was probably the first sign the rare form of cancer I am now fighting that had not been diagnosed at that time. Jessie J’s passion and talent helped me  through the sadness of not being able to sing the same, even though, I could hear the music the same way and it resonated to my core, I could not reproduce the notes that I heard with the same precision.

In 2010 I lost my job as a counselor due to cutbacks and I live on savings as long as I could. When I finally lost my house in 2012 because I couldn’t make the payments, as I was packing up my belongings Jessie J’s first album who you are was playing in the background. I will never forget praying to God to give me strength and to keep happiness in my heart even through the darkness I was facing much of the time sitting alone parking  my belongings for Storage because my family had gone to heaven. The one person’s voice that was always there in the background was Jessie’s. Thankfully  had amazing friends who helped me a as much as they could but late at night when the tears would flow it was God myself and Jess.

Slowly I began  to build clientele giving intuitive readings something I had done on the side for free just to help people for years. I began to understand this was gods way of getting me on my life’s purpose to really own the gifts he had  given because I’m a very loyal person and otherwise I never would’ve quit my job to follow the path as a spiritual teacher. Having success slowly building my own business with various opportunities to do readings on stage. Most stages are not wheelchair accessible and even though, I was the entertainment often I would have to do the readings or inspirational speaking on the ground or floor in front of the stage rather than on the stage. My preparation to get ready for readings has always been listening to music beforehand, music that usually consists of pop R&B or hip hop and traveling as far as Australia to study mediumship.

The most recent challenge I’ve had to deal with for the last three years is battling cancer thank God for Technology that allows me to do readings worldwide by email or Skype in between treatment on the occasions when I’m feeling halfway normal. As usual whether I’m going into emergency surgery to remove my port because of infection, or going in for treatment Jessie J’s singing through my phone. Hearing her voice sing conquer the world even regulated my heart beat while under anesthesia.

The power of social media and an Earth Angel disguised as a Record label executive colliding with me with the help of another Earth angel who is now in heaven named Talia Castellano who taught me through her YouTube videos how to apply makeup for my public readings and inspirational speaking. Before losing her battle to childhood cancer Talia I became friends and when I was diagnosed with cancer 31/2 years ago she was my counselor even at the young age of 12.  Now I honor her by helping to carry on her legacy and finding a cure for childhood cancer because after going through this myself I’m determined no child should go through it! Working her magic from heaven she helped Jessie’s Record label  follow me and  offer to help me get tickets if JessIe performed in Florida. Not only did I get to go to Universal Studios to see her perform but was granted the opportunity to meet her.

On April 9 with 101 fever the whole night before due to an enlarged spleen from a buildup of cancer cells and an infection and pain as a result of the enlargement. I was unable to leave on the three hour car ride up to Orlando until 1230 in afternoon. After coming up with a pain medication routine and reclining the passenger seat as far back as possible we began on the journey to make the ride to Talia’s house which was about 40 minutes from Universal Studios where the concert would be that evening. Talia’s sister Mattia and mom Desiree have become part of my family and a huge support system during my own Battle with this beast known as cancer. Therefore, I wanted them to join me in this exciting Adventure of meeting Jessie J.  My friend Sandra who is my sister by choice because she’s been with me through everything losing my job losing my house losing my health traveling an hour once a week just to bring food because I couldn’t afford to buy any or because I was too sick to make it myself. Sandra is my very best friend, she knows my heart, she knows my faults, she knows my flaws, she knows my happiness, knows my sadness, she knows my abilities and my disabilities and loves me no matter what.  So she also had to be a part of this is special celebration of life through Jessie’s music.

When we arrived at the house we only have an hour before we had to leave for the concert so we quickly got out of the car and  Mattia did my makeup while Desiree Talia’s mom painted my nails. (Talia’s sister who is an amazing makeup artist like her little sister Taliajoy18 on YouTube. Although, Mattia Joyce who is also on YouTube has her own sense of style, her own sense of humor and a talent all her own while carrying on the beautiful Legacy of her little sister. ) Helping me get glammed up is something that comes very natural for Mattia and Desiree because they continue a program Talia started called Glam Wars where they go into children’s hospitals and give makeovers two little girls going through chemo and face painting to little boys going through chemo to  help them feel more confident and happy during their fight. CoverGirl provides all the makeup for the program Since Talia became an honorary Cover Girl on the Ellen  show.( To find out more about this program please go to taliaslegacy.org)

Rushing out the door we head to Universal Studios arriving early until we realize how long the customer service line was where we were supposed to pick up the passes to go to the concert. Then I find out Jessie was running late. Before long the show was about to start so meeting Jessie was delayed until after the show. I began to worry maybe we would run out of time or maybe it wouldn’t happen that is until, I reminded myself I had asked Talia to send me a sign that she would be with me in spirit. Days earlier I asked her to send me a feather representing one of her Angel feathers. Hours before the concert , Jessie posted on Instagram a picture of a hummingbird made out of paper or  Kleenex  held in someone’s hand but what stood out in the picture was the delicate beautiful feathers that were part of the hummingbird and I knew that was my sign from Talia. I sang my heart out to every song watching Jessie on the big screen because the wheelchair accessible Area was pretty far back. When the song Bang Bang came onI got a text it was the last song to start heading over where we would meet her. So we all rushed over to where we were supposed to meet her before the show. When we got there and there was a young man he said no she’s meeting you somewhere else. We followed the path through the back ways of the park and my heart began to pound as I realized how close I was to meeting her something I wanted to do for years. If I was able to get up from my wheelchair and run I would have at that moment. As we approached Jessie was seated halfway in her rental car in the passenger seat and again my brain started thinking oh she’s ready to leave she’s going to say hi and take off. This was a huge lesson for me because fear allows our mind to create a story that is so different from god’s plan. Jessie stepped out of the car walked over to me and knelt down to be at eye level with me in my wheelchair. I started to cry and I explained to her it wasn’t because she was famous it wasn’t because she was JessieJ, tears were flowing because since my family is in heaven her voice through her music is always there no matter what and to be in front of her for that reason was overwhelming. I gave her a necklace I designed that is a guitar pick that says Jessie your music helps me breathe Friends forever on the front and a music note on the back. I have a matching one that I wear all the time for inspiration and now she would have hers. Then I asked her if I could show her one more thing? Jessie replied of course you can! I apologized because I told her it was 17 minutes long, I wrote a poem using all her song titles from each of her three albums and made a video of it on YouTube. (I wrote it when I was very sick in the hospital in intensive care and the nurse told me I should be resting, it was a waste of time because Jessie would never see it. My dream was for Jessie to see the poem because I have an easier time expressing myself through writing and the poem embodied everything I wanted to say to her. Jessie sat on the ground held my hand and watched the entire thing as the tears just ran down my face as a result of the happiness that was overflowing from my heart and had to come out through my eyes. Then Jessie and I made a video that I will show the nurse tomorrow when I go to the hospital for chemo. Jessie and I had fun saying she did indeed see the poem. I showed Jessie my tattoo and explained why I have tattoos, and that the other person tattooed on my arm is Talia. Jessie said she knew who Talia was and had followed her story. This was the perfect opportunity to introduce her to Desiree and Mattia and explain why I’m so passionate about childhood cancer, since seven children die a day from childhood cancer, 46 children are diagnosed every day with childhood cancer and it is the leading cause of death for children under the age of 15 in the United States. Sadly, childhood cancer still receives the least amount of funding to find a cure getting only 4% the cancer research money to understand how pediatric cancer forms differently and come up with treatment options specific to treating childhood cancer.  Gold is the color for childhood cancer and September is childhood cancer awareness month so I gave Jessie a fuck cancer beanie with gold writing as well as shared some other ideas on how to bring awareness to pediatric cancer. I told her some secrets like who I have a crush on, I shared other private thoughts and moments for her to carry in her heart for inspiration. I wanted our time together to be one where I could give  back to her, the best of myself through writing, encouragement, laughter. and inspiration. I knew Jesse J was a special person because I can see peoples energy but she goes above and beyond she was severely jetlagged wasn’t feeling well and still made time to do a Make-A-Wish meet and greet before the concert and spent over an hour with me after the concert. I jokingly told her I was so relieved she was nice because I wouldn’t have to get my tattoo removed.

She took pictures with all of us and even invited me to see her in Miami perform so she could sing bald girls instead of bad girls in this song Bang bang! Jessie’s team was trying to arrange to get me onstage with Jess, but as usual the stage was not wheelchair accessible. It  needs to become a priority that all stages become accessible because as long as they are not there is an unspoken message silently screaming that people in wheelchairs or with differences do not belong on the stage or a  platform to be heard. I completely understand because I’ve dealt with this my whole life.  Maybe now that Jessie’s team asked for someone in a wheelchair  to be on stage it will start a small ripple that will change this unspoken discrimination. Jessie being the earth angel that she is, kept her word, I just got back from the Miami concert last night and she absolutely did sing bald girls during bang bang as well as, took the time to give me one more  hug, reassure me that she has my necklace, Tell me she loved me. And made sure Sandra and I we’re all set to get home with the chauffeur her amazing manager Cez arranged when he found out I didn’t have a car to get there. Jessie’s entire team is amazing Alisha, Jessie’s hairstylist waited patiently in the car while Jessie and I hung out. Jessie’s manager Cez made sure everything fell into place with perfection and smiled with joy as I met Jessie. They are all kindhearted legends who’s shoulders Jessie stands on to spread hope, love, empowerment, fun, and realism with the world.  Jessie and her entire team hold a special place in my heart until I see them again and one day I dream of writing a song or working on a creative project with Jessie in person or in spirit however God sees fit. I love you Jessie, Cez and Alisha forever sending you  multitudes of gratitude and carry all you in my heart.

Summer Daze is Coming to an End; Moving Forward to Being on the Mend

Tuesday, August 18th, 2015

I’ve spent a lot of time recently, thinking about the summer, and all that I hoped to do. The summer definitely did not turn out as planned, but there were big blessings and lessons in trusting and faith that I am eternally grateful for, and, looking back, I wouldn’t ask for anything else. I had hoped to go to California, New York,  Maryland, and Disney World. Instead, it was considered a good week if I could make it out of bed and go somewhere local for a couple of hours. I love my gift of foreseeing the future, and while at times it can be frustrating not to be able to foresee my own, I certainly understand why, in the long run, that, too, is a blessing. If I knew that I would get two kidney infections, a stomach infection, have countless days with fever and pain, multiple trips to the E.R., and two hospitalizations this summer, I might have tried to build my own time machine, and get the hell out of this lifetime. However, not knowing that all of that was in store this summer, theres no time machine in my closet, and I have learned multiple lessons about my own strength and about being grateful for even the smallest moments that are pain or fever-free. I’ve also learned to submerge myself in the harmonious waves of music that has always served as my lifejacket in life, to keep me from drowning, when the storms come rolling in one after another. Literally, when I lose my breath from pain, music breathes new life into my body.

I have also found myself repeatedly thankful for social media. We hear of many negative things about social media, bullying and the loss of social interaction as a symptom of a society obsessed with technology. Very seldom do we focus on the positive aspects of social media. Lately, I have been recognizing and grateful for the positives of social media. YouTube videos have become a therapeutic outlet to share my journey and, at the same time, a motivator to connect and work with make-up, when the last thing I’m feeling is beautiful. I learned to use YouTube as my therapy, and find passion with the art of make-up, from one the greatest inspirations and make-up gurus ever born, Talia Joy Castellano.

Tomorrow is her birthday, and while she is no longer here with us in the physical form, all those that love her, have chosen to celebrate the day that she was born, and all the blessings that her life poured upon the world, in large part, through social media.

On days when I miss my long hair, and the multitude of colors that it has been over the years, I watch her videos for inspiration, to make me proud to be part of the “Bald is Beautiful” crowd. YouTube has also allowed me to chronicle the blessings and fun memories sprinkled in moments of calm before the next storm. Also, social media has allowed me to reach out, publicly, as I’ve needed a helping hand to brace the storms that illness can bestow on you financially. The response I’ve received in terms of financial donations, big and small, prayers, and care packages, has truly been overwhelming and kept me going during these last few rounds of the battle to be well. I wanted to extend my sincerest thank you and, while neither the storms nor the battle are far from over, the light at the end of the tunnel has begun to seep through and become visible, allowing me once again, to stay focused on my career goals of creating a larger platform from which to inspire, uplift and share love with all walks of life. Though most of my day tomorrow will be spent in the doctor’s office, keeping the beast at bay, I will be watching YouTube and sharing Talia’s story multiple times, with other patients and medical practitioners, who always seem to approach and say, “Hey there! What’cha watching?” I wish, more than anything, Talia could still be here, in the flesh, to celebrate her birthday Hawaiian style with her family and friends. While this is impossible, I do find comfort in knowing that she will, most certainly, be able to multi-task in spirit and be with her family, friends and drop in on me at the doctor all at the same time.

Ironically, my communication with Talia happened via the computer, and a majority of my interaction with others, is happening through e-mail. I find great joy in doing the e-mail readings because they are logistically easier, allowing me to work on them when I’m feeling well, while simultaneously preventing exposure to others, for fear of catching something because of my lowered immune system. The e-mail readings also force me to use my gift in a different way. I have to contain the energy connection, made when connecting to the composer of the e-mail, and become even more meticulous with my listening skills, to translate the messages from Spirit onto the page. There is a subtlety and precision that comes with this form of reading, that carries with it, a different type of frequency and focus needed. This e-mail-based time period of work will only enhance my gift, and from it, spiritual development has certainly emerged. Among my newly-inspired social media projects, is my account on the Periscope platform. This is a mobile cell phone app, that allows you to video yourself live, and connect with those that follow you on Periscope. This app gives me the opportunity to, once again, begin doing my radio show, Latte of Heaven, that I dearly loved doing, weekly, over the internet. I plan to broadcast, ia Periscope, once a week, Thursday nights at 7 p.m. EST, allowing for followers to ask question s and interact during each broadcast covering an array of spiritual topics, inspiration, and hopefully entertainment along the way. Of course, I will use that platform to also spread awareness about childhood cancer within the parameters of the predominantly spiritual broadcast.

I pray that as each of you look back over your summer, you find the blessings within even the darkest storms, that are there to, ultimately, teach us lessons in gratitude for life’s beautiful summer, sunny daze.

The Magic of MJ Lives on

Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Today marks the five year anniversary of Michael Jackson leaving this planet to return home as an angel in heaven. I was blessed recently to attend the magical Cirque de Soleil honoring the King of Pop, and I will certainly never forget that night. However, the magic that is Michael Jackson impacted my life long before attending that show. I remember being a little girl, sitting in front of the television, watching Michael Jackson dance, with children in a Pepsi commercial, and thinking, “I wanna be just like him when I grow up.” Not even realizing at the time, that I had a difficulty walking, much less dancing as though I was weightless and floating across the floor. But, it wasn’t just his ability to dance or sing. It was the effervescent light, or energy, that permeated the room, even through the screen of a television. That same energy that has caused hundreds of girls, women and even men alike, to pass out in his presence. That same energy that catapulted him to fame like none other. I even begged for a silvery-white glove to wear, and I remember being told by other boys, in my elementary school class, “you can’t wear that. You’re a girl!” Of course, I responded, “Who says? My aunt said, ‘if the glove fits, wear it.’” Even at the young age of 12, when the epic song, Man in the Mirror, came out, my fascination and admiration for Michael Jackson, became even stronger because 12 was the age that I really began to feel a calling within myself to serve the world and make it a better place. Of course, at 12, idealism runs rampant in the mind. and I thought, with love and compassion, all the world’s problems could be solved, and this song Man in the Mirror, became an anthem that I played relentlessly, until I, literally, wore out the cassette tape.

Fast forward to 1998, I was  a young 22 year-old, planning to make the big move across country to Los Angles, the west coast. If any of my dreams to serve and make the world better could happen, I was sure they could happen there. The first time I went to Los Angeles, I was completely blown away by the number of young adults and teenagers that were homeless on the streets of Santa Monica beach. Of course, being from Washington, D.C., I had seen my share of homeless people, but never homeless children. So, with my beloved anthem, Man in the Mirror, blaring out of the speakers of my rented van, while on one of my first of many trips to prepare and set out for the move, I went into McDonald’s and bought $150 of hamburgers and cheeseburgers, with the song Man in the mirror, blaring ,i handed out as many hamburgers and cheeseburgers as $150 was able to purchase. For the most part, the kids were very grateful, and very obviously longed for someone to talk to. I had heard stories of survival, rebellion, tragedy and inspiration, that i sill carry close to my heart. Eventually, when I did move to Los Angeles, there was a young man named Nathan, who I kept up with. He wasn’t like the other kids. He was filled with ambition, and truly wanted “off the streets.” Bur, he escaped a home where he had been severely beaten and abandoned, after he was caught kissing another boy behind the bleachers at his high school.  very often, I would bring him food, a blanket, or clothing that I thougtht would look nice on him. He told me one of the last times I saw him, that whenever he heard the song Man in the Mirror, he would think about the little angel in a wheelchair who passed out hundreds of hamburgers though he adniiteed the first time that happened, he was frightened, be ause the van that I had rented looked like “a gang member’s van with tinted window.’ with music blaring. He said he’d never been so shocked, to see Little Old Me, come ut in my wheelchair, with as many hamburgers as I could hold. I also had o teach myself, once I moved hftere, never to have cash on me, because I would inevitably be handing it out to kids in the street. I often wonder what happened to Nathan. I don’t know his last mane, or even if he’s still in California but I’m sure he’s found his way to success, with his optimism that was unfailing even in the worst of circumstances . And, I am proud, that I was able to play the smallest role in this journey, giving him a piece of Michael’s magic along the way. I still use that song to raise myself up, as an anthem, to continue serving,even if I’m met with criticism or unappreciated. i don’t mind because my efforts are pure, and as long as G-d and Michael can witness  my continued effort to pick myself up and be of service, I am content and peaceful.

The song is so full of truth and reflection. If we find ourselves in this modern world where taking selfies is often a daily activity, then we certainly have the opportunity to look at ourselves and ask, “what have we offered the world today?” Not just an image but from the heart. As many of you know, over the last couple of days, I have flooded social media with messages supporting and educating on childhood cancer, as yesterday was a day of great importance when advocates for this cause went to Capitol Hill to voice the need for more funding and research. One of the parents lovingly know as Tattoo Tom, started a non-profit organization called StillBrave, after his daughter, Shayla, passed away from cancer. His slogan is, “I asked, why isn’t somebody doing something, and then I realized I am somebody.” I mention Tom and that organization because that slogan truly captures the essence of that song, “Man in the Mirror.” Michael continues to be an advocate through his music, for humanity and children, with numerous songs, like “Black and White,” “Human Nature,” the Earth song, and, most recently, from the latest album , Xcape, “Do You Know where your Children are?” All of these songs and so many more, speak to equality, love, respect, and preserving human life and the planet. His passion and love for humanity, and changing the world for the better, will inevitably endear him to my heart. As is often the case, when an earth angel, uses their light to cast out darkness in the world, that darkness rises up in an effort to rob that light, and this happened to MJ, as he was countlessly falsely accused of terrible deeds ike harming children, being crazy, even putting his own children in harm’s way. I know with every fiber of my being, that he did no such thing, as these acts undeniably, go against everything he stood for. I do think he fell victim to substance abuse, in an effort to escape the demands of his iconic name, and the pain inflicted on him by the same people  in humanity he was working to save. Unfortunately, greed from those that worked for him led to his untimely death, as he was not properly protected or cared for, but rather used for his financial status and where he was able to buy compliance, giving him access to the deadly substances that ultimately lead to his death. But, whether he passed, because of carelessness and/or addiction, I believe his light-filled soul could only withstand the lower vibration of the earthly plane for so long, and his spirit had to return to the higher plane, where his heart and essence was free and will always be timeless.

My wish for the world is that more people will rise up, supporting causes that Michael supported, and embrace his music as a collective anthology of music to serve as their anthem, when they are in need of some Michael Jackson magic to lift them up so they can carry on to be of service.

Enraptured in the Immortal Presence that is Michael Jackson

Saturday, May 24th, 2014

This week has been one of the most fun-filled and gratifying blessings since the beginning of 2014. My birthday began before the 22nd and has continued through the Memorial weekend. One of the best gifts I received were tickets to the Cirque de Soleil concert honoring the late Michael Jackson. I had been counting the days for this concert weeks ahead of time. From a very young age, I felt a strong connection with MJ in his Mad Hatter genius attempts to facilitate social change in the artistic platform of music. Of course, in the early 80’s, I knew nothing more than “I like the beats and his shiny, sparkly gloves.” Though, looking back, I now realize that even back then, I was attracted to his light. At the age of 10, I begged for my own sparkly white glove. Not wanting to spend money, my aunt made me one, with a glove and some silver glitter, but I wore it with pride and joy. Then, when he appeared in Disney’s Epcot Center, in a 3-D movie with E.T., I was elated. When we made our first journey to Disney, and watched that attraction four times, while my cousins went on other rides in the park, it didn’t matter what the song was, if Michael’s name was attached to it, I was a fan. I remember the exact moment that I heard of his passing. Where I was and who I was with. It was a moment in time that will forever leave a void in  my heart and soul. Very shortly after his passing, I began feeling a connection with him in spirit, and even was told to take a picture in my bedroom late at night, and I would see his image. I did so, and there it was. The outline of his head with his infamous hat on. From that moment on, I have been blessed with numerous interactions with him in spirit, so I was elated when I received tickets to the Cirque du Soleil show on the 23rd.

The show captured his childlike personality, that longed for a childhood lost early on, but captured in his humor, music and many projects. My favorite part of the show was when the acrobatic performers wore silver-lighted costumes as they twirled in the air, in front of a backdrop made from what looked like a galaxy, creating the illusion of falling stars, to the rythymic magic that is his music. There was one performer that had only one leg, but he did Michael’s dance moves impeccably, occasionally using decorated crutches that blended and moved so flawlessly with his body that it was easy to forget that he only had one limb. A contortionist also glided across the pages of an enormous storybook, moving like a spider, ghost or gumbie-like superhuman, that moved in ways unthinkable to the human mind. The last moments that I have to acknowledge are those watching a young man who was afflicted with Down’s Syndrome, dressed in full Michael attire, complete with the red leather jacket, black shiny shoes, white glove and sparkly socks. When the classic Michael songs poured from the speakers, he would jump up from his seat and break out in Michael moves. His aura expanded so quickly, showing every color and his heart chakra was so full and blossomed from his body, that I felt blessed to be a part of his joy. How I longed to tell him that Michael Jackson was dancing his ass off in Spirit right alongside him. Of course, I didn’t. But, I took the moment in, knowing that it was one I’d never experience again, and one I’ll always treasure in my heart. It was surprising that, seemingly, the audience remained seated throughout the entire show. I, of course, danced my ass of in my wheelchair, which, a couple of times, I truly thought was going to bounce right off of the floor. Michael told me what parts of the show he treasured most, and what he would change, and also helped my understanding of the time that he had here on the planet. This understanding will forever impact my time on the planet, as spiritually, I know as I carry on, his spirit of love, social acceptance, saving the planet, and helping humanity and the insatiable passion to create lyrics and music, carries on.

Spiritual Infusion, a Creative Dance

Saturday, October 26th, 2013

My life has been a whirlwind of spiritual connection and creative bliss. I have been blessed to have the most incredible interactions with clients, both as connecting to the divine for psychic guidance as well as mediumship and uniting clients with their loved ones in spirit. Recently, as per my request, many of you have been sending me questions through Tumblr, YouTube, twitter and Facebook, about spirituality. And I know, for several blogs now, I’ve been saying that I will begin filming the answers. Unfortunately, I’ve been falling behind with the filming of Psychic in your Pocket, because other creative endeavors have been taking precedence. So I’ll take this opportunity in the blog to answer some of your questions.

Someone asked how I know where the information I receive during readings is coming from. I always know that psychic information is coming from the divine because I have been receiving this information since I was four and intuitive information from the Divine is always of the highest integrity and promotes someone’s safety, well-being and highest good even if it is not always the easiest to hear. My guide, Robin, first came to me at the age of four,and explained that she was from heaven, and that she would be my heavenly partner through life. I see her as I would see anyone I was looking at, although she is slightly translucent and she will often give me physical sensations that she’s around rather than fully materializing because that takes more energy.  sometimes, she will give me a sensation on my arm or brush my face, or I will feel supported behind me and I know that this is her, because it is always a warm, gentle energy. If she means business and really needs to get my attention, she will materialize and show me her wings. She has a huge wing span, and dark chocolate-brown hair, olive-toned skin, dark brown eyes, that feel as though they are looking through you, and she has been with me for 42 lifetimes. It is my understanding that we can have different guides for different lifetimes. But, sometimes a guide will be assigned to us for several lifetimes, to help us through different experiences creating our spiritual evolution process. Therefore, Robin,  obviously knows my spirit very well, and insistently but humbly requested from G-d, before I was born into this life,  that I acknowledge and know of her existence in this lifetime. Thankfully, that makes using my spiritual gifts easier, and somewhat unique, because of the  close bond that I share with Robin which is a constant companion and, indeed, a a partnership made in heaven.

I also tend to have psychic visions where I see what is happening in the near future as it relates to clients as well as people who I care about on a personal level. I have a strong, extensive symbolic vocabulary because of the intimacy and growing up withRobin. She helped me understand what different images or symbols mean. Of course, such is life, I am continually learning, and that vocabulary continues to grow as I interact with different people and experience things for the first time but I love the opportunity to evolve and grow.

As I mentioned before, lately, I have been very focused on creative projects involving writing for both television and film/media. This has always been a deep passion of mine, and one of my bachelors degrees is in theater production with an emphasis on creative writing. It is my philosophy that some of the best ways to inform people about god, Spirit, love, the afterlife, heaven, energy, anything, really, is through entertainment, because it is a platform where our heart is Open to receive vibrations that embrace enjoyment or relaxation, while activating the intellect is an added bonus. I can not wait to share more about these projects with you in the upcoming months. And I would ask if you don’t already, please “like” my fan page, follow me on twitter and Tumblr, as having a increase on social media following, will help me get the funding to get these projects up and running. I will also continue to serve my followers by offering free readings once a month on these platforms.

Another question I was recently asked was how I know when I’m speaking to  someone’s loved one in Spirit. this is rather a simple answer, I can see spirit before me in an outline form and as they come closer to me,for a period of time, the energy gets stronger and I can hear them more clearly, as well as sometimes see them more clearly. Then, after reaching  the optimal amount of strength during our interaction, the energy starts to become weaker until they are no longer visually there, but that doesn’t mean that they are not there. It just means the energy is not strong enough to allow them to materialize, but I know that I’m talking to someone in Spirit because I hear or see them and often they show up hours before I connect with the client who they are related to. Sometimes they talk to me by using symbols, similarly to how I receive psychic information, because it takes less energy to show me an image rather than try to be heard.also the reading can go so much faster because I already have an extensive symbolic vocabulary, the dialogue happens very rapidly and allows them to communicate more, given that there’s only an limited amount of time that they can come through strongly.

The other question that came in recently that was thought-provoking and fitting for this blog was what do I love more, doing my readings, or being creative through writing and music. For me, being creative is also a spiritual experience, so I don’t prefer readings over creativity or vice versa, because the divine energy is present through all the experiences. Creativity is more of an intimate connection with Spirit, for me personally, that activates healing, and a sense of expression and freedom that I feel from nothing else, and when creative projects are then shared, it is my hope that the healing I experienced will benefit others, although it will be healing in a way that more closely relates to their situation. Writing and music is a very organic process and often can feel like nurturing like a  mother nurtures a child, or a newborn baby. Inspiration wakes you up in the middle of the night, can hit you when least expected and often deprives you of sleep, but the joy and the result of that deprivation, is irreplaceable. Doing readings is also an intimate experience, but it is shared immediately between Spirit, myself, the client and their loved ones. The Vibration for  both activities is very high and definitely comes from a source greater than myself, but they are both beautifully different and equally appreciated. The main ingredient that’s needed for any spiritual experience whether it be through readings or creating, is trust. You have to trust that what you are receiving is exactly what is needed, while understanding that, yes, you are the instrument, or messenger, but the outcome and source does not come from you, but something that created you and therefore is intrinsically part of you. Wen you fully embrace trust, it allows you to be kind and help others. Because you realize that there’s enough divine energy, love and inspiration to be shared and experienced by all in each of our organic ways,and all of our input and unique way of expression and sharing these gifts are needed. So, don’t be afraid to help someone shine their light. Light never casts out light but only makes the beam brighter. Be proud of what you do, and who you are,  but in that pride take steps to share and be kind, realizing that the more light we have in the world, the clearer we an see that love is all that matters.

Talia’s Birthday Tribute - a Journey of Love

Thursday, August 22nd, 2013

For weeks, I have been working hard to make money and get things done so that I could take  the weekend off, to attend Talia Joy Castellano’s tribute. I first discovered Talia, after  one of my dear friends did my make-up at a spiritual conference, and I wanted to learn how to put make-up on more expertly, so another friend recommended I watch make-up tutorial videos on YouTube. I now know, certainly, not by accident, I found Talia’s YouTube channel She was a spunky, full-of-life, talented make-up guru and she was only 12 years old at the time. Before long, I connected with her through various social media platforms, and we communicated and I became a fan/friend of Talia’s over the Internet. She not only taught me about how to apply make-up from watching her videos, but she taught me how to be strong in the face of life’s challenges and to count your blessings, no matter what you’re facing. Talia also bravely shared her difficult battle with cancer very openly in her vlogs. I Always drew strength from her happy, bubbly personality and wise outlook. In life, I faced many a challenge, thinking what would Talia do or say. Over time, Talia’s health declined, but her personality and flair for life never faltered. I prayed for her and her family daily, and sent encouraging messages, while she spent large amounts of time in the hospital, fighting two forms of childhood cancers. Being that she only lived about 3 hours from me, I had always hoped to meet her in person, and I’m sure we would have, if given the chance. About two weeks before Talia’s passing, I began to send distant healing and prayers as much as I could, and as often as I could. Sometimes as a healer and a spiritual worker, I have to accept that healing does not always mean curative measures, but sending love and peace to the person to aid in whatever way G-d sees fit. It touched my heart deeply when Jamie, “the psychic,” host of the radio show, Cosmic Caffeine, was given the chance to do hands-on healing with Talia and her family in the hospital. Serving as an instrument that allowed G-d to work through her, Jamie provided pain relief and peace to beautiful Talia. Through G-d’s grace, Talia’s loved ones were granted precious time with Talia, while she was awake and alert, that they might not have been given if Talia, her family and Jamie, had not been so open, loving and ready to do whatever needed to be done, to allow G-d’s love to help her. That is a beautiful example of how free will comes into play. G-d is always there to help and love us, but the choices we make impact our complete acceptance and accessibility of that divine intervention. At 2 a.m., on July 16, I was awakened form a deep sleep, by my guide, Robin, who said, “Talia is transitioning.” I had  never sent healing to anyone transitioning from their physical into their spiritual form from a distance, so I didn’t know what to do, and my heart ached from the thought of not seeing another video or communicating with Talia over social media again, but as a light worker, I have taken an unspoken vow to use my life as a vehicle to spread and carry G-d’s love, serving the divine above all else. This sense of duty is often difficult, because my earthly human self has wishes, desires, and wants that do not always correlate with what is best for the highest good. This was certainly one of those times. My human heart wanted Talia to be here more than anything, so I gave myself a few minutes to grieve and accept that this was probably not going to be the case, and then took a deep breath, pulled myself together, gathered my favorite crystals, cleansed them and formed them in the shape of  a heart on the bed beside me.  Then, I said aloud,”Okay, I  am here to serve whatever G-d’s plans are and whatever Talia needs right in this moment. Please help me to be of service.” I closed my eyes and visualized Talia on her bed. The next thing I saw was myself floating above her, and then rolling out like a blanket, green light over her, beginning at her feet, going up to her shoulders. I also noticed I was taking slow, deep breaths, and, for a few minutes it even felt like, somehow, I was helping her breathe, like remotely using my lung capacity to even out her breathing. My guide, Robin, then told me to call in Archangel Raphael, the angel of healing, and visualize placing my hand intuitively where I felt she needed assistance, to ease pain or bring comfort. I visualized one hand placed gently on her stomach and the other hand over the heart, sending as much love and positive energy that I could. I did this for about a half-hour, and then my guide said, “Say a prayer.” I bowed my head, sitting up on my bed, hands folded and said, “Dear G-d, in heaven, I’m here to help as you know, and as a spiritual person, I know you always have a plan. If there’s any way that those plans can change, so that beautiful Talia can stay here on earth, and finish more of her dreams, I will be eternally grateful and help in any way I can, to serve you more completely. If that is not possible, please ease her pain and give her a special place in heaven. I vow, to you, and to her, that I will spend the rest of my life helping to educate about childhood cancer, and supporting Talia and her family in any way that I can. Eternally yours, Melissa.” Then, I placed my hand on my heart, and imagined sending out as much pink and white light as possible into my hand, and closed my eyes to visualize Talia placing that same hand where her heart would be. Tears began to fall, and I intuitively knew, with deep sadness, that her time here on earth was coming to an end. It took me a good 45 minutes to go back to sleep. I woke up at 11 a.m. Because my first appointment of the day was not until later, and at 12 noon, I saw the post that Talia had gotten her wings at 11:22 that same morning. Even knowing hours before that it was going to happen, I was deeply saddened, and reached out to her family on social media, giving as much support, love and prayers as possible. The family soon announced that there would be a public tribute to celebrate her life in Orlando. I wanted so much to go and be a part of it, to honor Talia and embrace her beautiful family. Unfortunately, traveling for me takes more planning and money than it does for most, even if the destination is a simple 3 & 1/2 hour car ride. Unable to drive, I need someone to do the driving and in order to travel long distances, I am most comfortable and do so most easily with my electric wheelchair. If I have the luxury of bringing my electric wheelchair, that involves securing a van with an automatic ramp that my wheelchair can securely travel in, and renting a wheelchair-accessible van is very expensive, typically over $100/day, plus mileage once surpassing whatever the allowed miles. The tribute was starting at 7:30 and lasting until 10:30 at night, so I knew most likely, we would need to pay for one night at a hotel. Therefore, a simple 24-hour trip can easily run hundreds of dollars! Which isn’t that much of an issue when there’s time to set money aside, but even working extra hours and cutting corners, I was unsure if I would be able to manage it, so I surrendered to Spirit and asked the angels to help me. Help me, they did indeed! One of my soul sisters Lisa Came to visit, and because we are so close, she knew I was sad over Talia’s passing. To my heart’s delight, she and some other close friends rallied together, to help me get there. The experience was truly amazing.

When my friend, Becky, went to pick up the van, the one they had available was brand new and a beautiful gold color, with the word “Star” written across one of the windows. We were going in style for Talia. Arriving in Orlando, we decided to have lunch at a restaurant in Disney’s Marketplace. The restaurant we chose was called “the T-Rex.” It was awesome. Once again, Talia gave us a huge sign that she was with us. The parking  lot was filled and, within minutes, we got the best parking spot. Then, we put our name in for our table, and I had to use the rest room, so our table was given away. The hostess then explained that we would no longer be sitting in the Ice Age (the restaurant is divided into historical, geographical eras); we had been move to the Coral Reef area. In this section of the restaurant, there was a massive tropical fish tank, with hundreds of fish, Ike clownfish and, of course, fish that looked like Dori, who is known to say, like Talia, “just keep swimming.” In fact, we were seated directly in front of the tank, and moments later, a little girl went up to the tank and said, “Look. It’s Dori! Just keep swimming.” So, once again, we knew Talia was there with us. We enjoyed our lunch and then celebrated Talia’s 14th birthday, by ordering a huge chocolate cake with ice cream, called the chocolate Extinction, complete with a volcano that smoked. It was sinfully massive and amazing. We had plenty to take back to the hotel! Lunch was such an event that we had very little time to get back to the hotel and change for the tribute. Just for Talia, I brought almost all my make-up and, thankfully, learning some of her trade secrets on You Tube, the make-up was both fun and pretty seamless. I wore a baby blue top, and a  matching skirt with baby blue embroidery, because blue was Talia’s favorite color. Upon arriving to the event, there were tons of news crews, traffic controllers, and you could feel the magic and tension in the air, all at the same time. Entering the church was like entering a Red Carpet event. As soon as you walked through the doors of the main Lobby, there were velvet ropes blocking off an area that had life-size cut-outs of Talia in her edgy, stylish fashion and a montaged backdrop with images of her glamorous eyes and her name. It indeed felt like Hollywood, honoring Talia. Then, once again, I’ m sure Talia assisted in helping me get a spot in the auditorium where I could see everything, but where I also had privacy to share in the event with my friend, Becky, and say my goodbyes to sweet Talia. On every large  screen, there were videos and photographs of Talia, beginning at birth and chronologically documenting her personality and her journey with cancer. The whole event was amazing, but the highlights for me were hearing her big sister,Mattia Joyce Castellano, sing “Dancing in the Sky” with her best friend, by Danni & Lizzy. If you’ve never heard that song, check it out on You Tube, as it captures the feelings experienced when someone you love dearly is now in heaven. Truly perfect song to dedicate to Talia. The other highlight included watching Talia’s best friend, Sheridan, perform a modern dance to the song, “NoDay but Today” from Rent. Elegant, exquisite and deeply moving are the only ways to describe it. Towards the end of the event, it was complete with a fashion show and, as the pastor stated in the beginning, I think Talia is one of the only people who would have a memorial so hip and special that it included a fashion show of her personal designs, with the help of Urbana Chappa. The collection is called Bald Chick Collection, and trust me when I say, the designs are edgy and hip. At the end, one of the most moving moments was hearing Desiree, Talia and Mattia’s mom, speak, and asking everyone to sing, “HappyBirthday” to Talia, which we did. Then, at the very end, if there were anyone left in the auditorium who had not shed a tear, this was the deal breaker. Talia’s stepfather spoke about Desiree’s endless support of Talia and credited her with being an earth angel. You could feel his love for these girls. They even served little chocolate cupcakes with pink pearls on top. Absolutely perfect for Princess Talia! I made my way to Talia’s sister, Mattia, and she immediately knew who I was. I thanked her for sharing her sister with the world, myself included, told her how much she and Talia meant to me and promised to help in any way I can, fight childhood cancer and carry on Talia’s legacy. Knowing that Mattia felt my same sense of loss, but 10,000 times more deeply, it was hard to hold back tears when speaking to her. It was a total honor. She was mature, sophisticated and represented Talia beautifully. We took a photograph together and then I  went to her mother. Desiree knelt down beside my Chair and listened intently to everything I had to say, completely present and she radiated love every moment. We embraced and also took pictures, and I promised her as well, that I would continue to carry all of them in my heart and help be part of Team Talia forever. I feel more peace since being able to attend the tribute and there are so many dreams Desiree and Mattia will carry on for Talia in her name and I want to be a part of everything. They gave me permission to write this blog and I want to thank Lisa, Becky, Jennifer, Sandra, Mattia, Desiree, and last but not least, everyone’s angel, mine included, Talia Joy Castellano.

First Sip of Latte of Heaven

Sunday, August 4th, 2013

Wow! What a busy week last week was. I taught some students mediumship development, did as many readings as I could fit in, worked on creative writing, and the thing I am, indeed, most excited about, launched “Latte of Heaven,” my brand new radio show on Blogtalk, which airs every Thursday at 6 p.m. EST. I had the most incredible time with my first guest, Anna Taylor. she is an amazing angel therapist, giving angel guided-readings, and a talented musician, singer/songwriter, as well. the first show was actually discussing music and how music can serve to break down barriers and unite people. Also, how music can be used to raise our vibration, so that we can receive clearer messages and find peace and harmony within our daily lives. The link is: www.spiritualconnectionsradio.com Once you get to the main page, look down in chronological order for Thursday night at 6, & you will find all the playback links to the shows.

The radio show addressed music’s ability to unite people and that is, indeed, true, however, music also has the incredible ability to unite us to our loved ones who are no longer with us, or as Anna mentioned in the show, music can be used as a tool to receive messages from our angels, guides and departed loved ones. This characteristic of music was crescendoed in my life, when a music group called Gospel Boys, wrote a tribute song for Talia Joy Castellano, the make-up guru and sensational You Tuber who passed away from Cancer on July 16th. I, indeed, miss seeing Talia’s happy, beautiful face over social media and hearing her messages of inspiration, however, when I hear the tribute song written for her, I immediately feel closer to her, as the music raises my vibration and the slightest bit of relief is felt in my daily missing of her. Another song written for her by Gina Pichulo, called Talia’s Song, captures her spirit and beauty, and I listen to both songs, by two different artists with two different styles, and feel closer to her, so be sure to check these out on ITunes, if you are missing  our angel, Talia.

I hope that my first radio show captured the magical ability of music to unite us, no matter where we are, in the physical or in spirit. This new opportunity allows Spirit to work through me, and reach more people, spreading love, light, inspiration and education over the Internet. in the weeks to come, there will be giveaway items, contests, psychic/mediumship and medical intuitive readings, as I allow Spirit to guide me and formulate future shows.  this week’s show will be equally exciting and fun as I will be joined by Heather Tobin, an incredible medium, intuitive and musician in her own right. Please tune in as it is sure not to disappoint.

my heart is also filled with joy as I’ve been surrounded by soul sisters this summer, supporting me through this journey of life and this new creative endeavor.  I will share more about this sisterhood and soul family next week. Until then, love, light and blessings, and don’t forget to tune in for your weekly “Latte of Heaven.”